Two Months Home

Yesterday was our two month anniversary of being home.  The exhaustion and frustration of the trip home still seem so recent.  But every time I look at Eyob, I'm struck by how far we've already come.  His eyes sparkle, he smiles all the time, and we're starting to understand why everyone in Ethiopia kept telling us he was funny.  This boy is mischievous!  He fits into this family perfectly.  He's also extremely compassionate and affectionate.  What an amazing boy we have!

We've had many ups and downs so far, but now that Eyob has a bit of English things are getting easier.  Yesterday he told me "yes ma'am" at an appropriate time.  Earlier this week he told his doctor "no hurt Eyob" followed by a long string of emphatic Amharic and then he hid his arm from her.  He didn't want any more blood draws, which thankfully they didn't have to do.  On Sunday, he was being so silly in church that I giggled through most of the sermon.  Life is good. 

I'm so far behind on blogging our trip that it's not even funny.  But, five kids keep me busy so I'm not gonna bust my own chops too much.  Here are some pictures, which are probably much more fun anyway.

Fun with Tatum

Mama cuddles

So darn cute!

Those eyes!  Be still my heart!

Playing cowboy at our old fashioned family picnic

Our Story

I took custody of our sweet boy two months ago today!  Here's a video montage that tells our story.

Days 6 & 7

Our bed net, which probably swayed while we slept

Cade and I got up the next morning and headed down to breakfast with my dad.  I discovered that my phone could get a wifi connection in the breakfast area and Justin was online, so we immediately started chatting.  So when my dad asked if we felt the earthquake during the night, I didn't really pay much attention.  I kind of laughed, thinking he was joking.  But, he said the net above his bed was rocking back and forth and even the bed itself was swaying.  Ummmmm..... no.  I didn't notice anything like that.  How well does that Advil PM work?  Good grief!  As we met up with our group to head out, they were all talking about the earthquake, too.  The hotel staff said it was the first one in thirty years.  Just our luck to be there when it happened.  Cade is so bummed that we slept through it!  I'm extremely glad that it wasn't major.  

Lewi Resort in Awassa

Off we went in the van.  We stopped at a resort in Awassa to look around.  Lake Awassa was beautiful and the resort was lovely.  We enjoyed seeing the monkeys running around everywhere!  We piled back in and drove the six or so hours back to Addis.  We arrived two hours before we were scheduled to take custody of the children.

Most of the families went to their rooms to rest, but we and another couple called for a taxi and went on a quick shopping trip.  We made it back just in time to jump in the Holt van [it was early!] and drive to the care center.  I was so drained at that point, after the emotional meeting with Eyob's Abat and all of the driving, that I don't think it really sank in that this was actually it!

Cutting the cake at the ceremony

We walked in and the kids were dressed in their traditional outfits.  So. Stinkin. Cute.  They were tailor made over the weekend for each child.  What a wonderful keepsake!  My dad prayed for all of the families and children, then everyone took turns cutting the cake.  Of course, there was also a coffee ceremony.  

Eyob didn't want anything to do with us.  He was terrified.  He kept wanting to sit with the kids who were observing, not with the other guests of honor.  I started thinking about it and realized that he had been at the care center in Addis for almost two years.  He'd probably sat through at least 30 going away ceremonies and didn't know how to act now that it was finally his turn to leave.  We let him wander and talked to the nannies and the director.  Cade made friends with the director's son and they had a lot of fun talking and playing.

My terrified new son

Before long, it was time to leave.  Eyob was ready for that part.  We walked down the steps, got in the van, he waved and yelled "ciao" to everyone, and we headed back to the Jemimah.  They had dinner waiting for us, but Eyob wouldn't eat.  There was a mirrored support pillar in the dining room and he stood in front of it staring at his reflection the whole time.  I wasn't too worried about him not eating, since he had cake and popcorn at the ceremony.

Leaving the care center

We got him to sleep pretty easily and he only woke up crying once in the night.  It was a pretty successful start to our relationship, but soon I was extremely grateful to be a seasoned parent.

We got up early the next morning to head to the embassy.  Eyob was quiet and wouldn't eat breakfast but did drink a little of the powdered milk I'd purchased.  I was a bit concerned, but there was no time to spare.  We got in the vans and headed to the embassy.  Suddenly, Eyob threw up all over me and himself.  A lot of puke!  Seriously how could all of that be in his stomach since he's hardly ingested anything!  All we had were kleenex and wet wipes and they weren't doing the job.  We were both soaked.  So my awesome father took off the t-shirt he had on under his button down and gave it to me to clean up the mess.  I did the best I could, but we reeked.  The driver said that a lot of kids get car sick at first, so that's what we assumed it was.  

When we got to the embassy, I cleaned us up the best I could in the bathroom and we waited for our turn.  It didn't take too long and all of our paperwork was in order.  Relief!!!  Now all we had to do was wait for the visa to be ready in 48 hours and we could head home.

After embassy - our official paperwork!

We went back to the guesthouse and hung out for the rest of the day.  Eyob loved blowing bubbles and he played a little bit of soccer with the other kids.  He didn't eat anything for the rest of the day, even though he told the guard he was hungry and the kitchen made some injera just for him.

Playing the day away

As we were getting ready for bed, he threw up again.  Uh oh.  I really hadn't thought any more about it.  Maybe he wasn't car sick after all...

Watching a DVD after we realized something was wrong

My Boys on April 25

Easter 2011 with an Ethiopian flare

Thirteen years ago today, I got the best birthday gift ever!  I gave birth to our oldest son, Cade - the day before my 21st birthday.  Hard to believe he's already 13.  I swear I blinked and suddenly he's a teenager.  It's always bittersweet for me when the kids have a birthday hit a big age milestone like one year old, kindergarten age, etc.  But this time I'm finding that I'm excited about the coming years.  

Cade getting older has made me reevaluate who I am.  For 13 years now, I have seen myself as a mother to small children, an expert in all things poo and puke related.  That was my identity.  I think when the kids are little and it's so exhausting just to meet their needs every day, you kind of forget that you're shaping future adults.  It's been an adjustment to think of myself as a mother to someone who will be driving soon, deciding what he wants to do with his life, and will ultimately leave the nest and fly far and high.  I've been really thinking about this over the past year, especially during the trip Cade and I took to Africa.  His viewpoint added such interesting elements to the trip and his sense of adventure added a lot of fun.  I so love who he is!  He brings such joy and laughter to our lives!  I thank God daily for blessing us with this boy.

Today is also a milestone for our other guy.  Eyob has been home for one month today.  In some ways it seems like it's been a year and in some ways it seems like we just stepped off that plane.  He's come so far, so fast.  It's been a bumpy journey at times, but when I smile at him and he responds by smiling back instead of just gazing at me with those sad, blank eyes, my heart melts into a big ol' puddle.  Last night, we went to our first social gathering since he arrived and he did really great.  We didn't even have one meltdown.  Ahhhh-mazing!  His english improves by the hour, although I do call him my little parrot.  He repeats things over and over without having any idea what he's saying.  This morning, he repeatedly pledged his love to a Walmart clerk while we checked out.  Like Cade, Eyob has a funny personality [haha funny, not weird funny like their dad].  It's such an adventure getting to know him and watching as he becomes more comfortable in his new environment.  He can now be in the same room as the dog, sit in a bath without freaking out, and deal with ice in his cup.  I think the past month has been an epic success. 

Day 5

Sunrise in Ethiopia

We headed out from the Jemimah at at 5:30 on Saturday morning.  We traveled six hours south to meet with Eyob's Abat.  Ethiopia is a beautiful country.  The drive was gorgeous, but also heart wrenching.  Almost every person we saw was carrying a yellow water jug.  People were filling them up at dirty rivers, with muddy water beside the road, and at wells, which were far between.  We were already aware of the water situation because it factored into why Eyob is now with our son.  We do not share his story with people.  It's his to tell.  But, I will say that it has given me a passion for clean water.  Justin has always shared this, but now my dad and Cade are also on fire for it.

Women and children getting water

So, we drove for hours and then stopped at the medical center that Holt is funding.  There's an existing clinic on site and we were able to look around.  I, of course, wanted to see the labor and delivery area.  When I did, my heart sank.  I am a doula and an advocate for homebirth.  My last daughter was born in a pool in our bedroom.  Amazing!  But, I'm also grateful for the medical technology that's available to us when it's truly needed.  This is what women in that region get when they're in trouble and need medical intervention:

L&D Room

 More pics at Shinshicho:

Construction in Progress

The On Site Lab

My Dad talking to the doctor

A sick child in the waiting area

From there, we piled back in the van and drove an hour or two more to Durame.  We had lunch at a place that I don't think saw a whole lot of faces our color.  I met a really nice guy in the bathroom [yep, unisex bathroom] who wanted to know where I was from and all about my trip.  He said I could contact him at any time during our time in Ethiopia if I needed anything and he would come to me.  :)


I hardly ate any lunch.  I was sick about the meeting with Eyob's Abat and spent the time going over the questions I had for him.  After awhile, we headed off to our destination - the care center in Durame.  Eyob was there for a short while, before he was transferred to Addis Ababa for his little surgery.  During the drive, Cade started feeling nauseated from his lunch.  We're not sure what it was that he ate, but we think it was goat meat.  So, he stayed outside the gate with my dad, retching in the bushes while I went in for the little mini orientation.  They soon joined me and we went into the meeting.

Meeting Eyob's Abat was an emotional experience that I still haven't recovered from.  Again, we are not sharing details from this part of our trip.  I can say that he's an amazing, Godly man and we are forever joined by the son we share.

Cade and his new friend

Cade's friend giving him a mango as a gift

From there, we went to the orphanage to love on babies!  There were 50 little babies and many, many nannies.  It's a cheerful, clean place and we enjoyed our time there.  An older boy, probably about five or six years old, befriended Cade and dragged him all over the place showing him around.  Cade loved it.  I was dying to hold every single one of the babies, but only held a few.  It made me happy to know that almost all of them were already matched with families.

Children outside the orphanage

Finally, we got in the van one more time for the two hour drive to Awassa.  Oh my goodness, that drive!  I was so sick the whole time.  The road was bad and I think the emotion of the day was overwhelming me.  It was such relief to arrive at our hotel, which was very nice.  I immediately collapsed on the bed and slept until Cade woke me up for dinner.  I still couldn't eat, but my dad and Cade did.  

Lewi Hotel in Awassa

Cade and I took some meds to help us sleep and next thing we knew it was morning.  Turns out, we slept right through an earthquake...