Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world. ~ James 1:27

24 December 2010

Merry Christmas!

Can't wait until all five of our kiddos are together for a picture!  In the meantime, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! 

Gotta say, 2011 promises to be epic.  Little E will finally join our family and Justin will graduate from law school.  I'm dizzy with excitement!  Or maybe I'm just woozy from lack of sleep, since Maci has insisted on sleeping sideways in our bed all week, head butting my stomach every 32.7 seconds.  Either way, exciting stuff coming up for the Robbs Tribe!

22 December 2010

Last minute Christmas gifts ...


As we go through Christmas, let us think about the real meaning of Christmas.  I’ve posted this video several times of facebook, because the message is so powerful.  Nevertheless, it is something to revisit.  So before we get to far into this post, watch this video …


As we prepare for last minute Christmas shopping, we need to ask ourselves, “do we care about the things God cares about?”  Do we care about them at the level that God does?  When Jesus was in the Garden of Gethsemane, he cared so much and wept so thoroughly that he began to perspire drops of blood.  Do we care about the lost and needy of the world that way?  Does our level of caring come close to that?

Jesus came, not just to save our sin, but to show us how to live and how to love.  In John 13:34-35, Jesus says, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another.  By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.”  The love that he speaks of is the same love that led Jesus to that moment in Gethsemane.  This is the love we must express if we are disciples of God.  This is the love that should move us to reach out to a lost and needy world.

God needs us to show that love to this world.  As it said in the video, we are God’s hands.  We are God’s feet.  If God isn’t moving, it is because WE aren’t moving.  People are suffering and dying throughout this world and everyone wants to blame God.  They can’t see God’s heart in the world.  They can’t see His compassion and love.  Why?  Because we (Christians aka you and me) are not showing it.  If God is not seen in situations around the world, it is because WE are not involved in those situations.  God’s heart is reflected through our heart.  If our hearts show depraved indifference to the sufferings of widows and orphans, then God’s presence in this world is dying.

My favorite line of the video is “Heroes are made because they are moved, not in their head, but in their heart.”  This Christmas let God move your heart to become a hero for someone in need.  Open your heart to the suffering and darkness of the world.  Jesus is the reason for Christmas.  The gift of Jesus goes beyond the forgiveness of sin.  It is also the gift of sharing His love to the weak and vulnerable, the widows and orphans.  (See James 1:27)  Share that gift of Christ’s love to the world.  We must soften our hearts to the point where it breaks for lost and needy. 

What situations has God placed on your heart?  Whose situation makes your heart break to the point of tears?  The video speaks about orphans in Liberia, but there are people and situations all over the world that need God.  He has given us a heart and a passion to help in each of these situations.  We are all uniquely created to represent God in the areas that he has laid on our hearts. 

Be encouraged and inspired by Proverbs 24:10-12 “If you falter in a time of trouble, how small is your strength! Rescue those being led away to death; hold back those staggering toward slaughter.  If you say, “But we knew nothing about this,” does not he who weighs the heart perceive it?  Does not he who guards your life know it?  Will he not repay everyone according to what they have done?  We must take these passions that are on our hearts and let them motivate us to action.

Finally, listen to this song by Matthew West and focus on the words.  There is a bigger picture, there is a greater purpose and we are missing out. The challenge is to step out of the box and dare to see the world beyond "me, myself and I."  As you get to the bridge, let that be your prayer …
“Father break my heart for what breaks yours,
Give me open hands and open doors
Put your light in my eyes and let me see
That my own little world is not about me.”


Below are some links to different organizations.  They all list different ways to give or get involved.  Let one of your last minute Christmas gifts be to one of these or another similar organization or someone that you know personally who is in need.  Your kids/family/friends/coworkers can survive with one less Christmas present.

http://www.holtinternational.org/ (buy presents from their catalog and help needy children)
http://www.abqrescue.org/getinvolved/getinvolved.php (help those right here in Albuquerque)
http://www.nmbch.com/ (another NM opportunity)

God Bless,
Justin

21 December 2010

Christmas Struggles

We are still waiting for news of an embassy date.  It will probably be at least another month before we know anything.  We assume that all of our paperwork is now in order and that we're legally Little E's parents.  Most likely, our embassy date will be February 8.  That's not for sure, though.  It's just an educated guess based on communication with mamas who are as desperate and obsessive anxious as me.

This year, we've really struggled with Christmas for three reasons.  Most obviously, we started out last Christmas morning crying over our tiny dead baby as he lay in my hands.  Secondly, our children are on two different continents and it's impossible to explain the emotion of that to someone who has not experienced it.  We are beyond ready for Little E to join our family and to put the whole adoption experience behind us.  Third, compounding the sorrow of everything else, three weeks ago we were in Ethiopia and witnessed the stark need of the people there.  We dropped from that right into the middle of the annual, materialistic frenzy that passes as the celebration of our Savior's birth.  We can hardly stomach it this go round.  The kids don't need anything.  We don't need anything.  I feel like we're spending money out of obligation, rather than joy.  Every item I purchase, I stop and think how many kids that money could feed in Ethiopia.  What a difference my measly fifty bucks would make over there.  Ugh.

I don't know what the answer to our dilemma is.  We're evaluating our lives and discussing choices we could make after Justin graduates from law school next December.  We know that we want to live even more radically than we already do.  We only get one chance at this life and we want to make it count.


As you go through the remainder of this Christmas season, consider what you could do to make a difference in the world.  If you're still looking for last minute gifts, maybe a donation to help those in need would be just the thing.  Here's a link to Gifts of Hope at Holt: https://www.holtinternational.org/gifts/
 
Please check out the link above and listen to the song below.  Remember to appreciate your loves ones this Christmas season and focus on the things that are most important.  Above all, don't forget what we're truly celebrating.

Have I not wept for those in trouble? Has not my soul grieved for the poor? Job 30:25 

12 December 2010

Ethiopia - Second Half of Day 2

We arrived back at the guesthouse for lunch and the food was delicious.  The staff at the Jemimah is amazing.  Then we hopped back in the van to go shopping.  I really didn't want to go, but it turned out to be a good experience.  As they followed us from shop to shop, the children would say, "I love you  Mommy [or sista].  I want to go to America with you."  It was difficult to look at their sweet faces and be able to do nothing but give them a granola bar.  

We shopped for about an hour and went back to the Jemimah again.  They had a coffee ceremony waiting, which turned out to be very cool and the coffee was amazing!  When that was done, we went upstairs and finished packing.  Then we got into the van yet again to go to dinner at Avanti's, an Italian restaurant.  We had a lot of fun with our new friends and all got along really well.  Justin and I were sad to see the evening end.

After dinner, we stopped by the Jemimah to get our bags and drop everyone else off.  It was hard to say goodbye.  We got to the airport and as we were doing all of the check in stuff, we noticed that the Ethiopian soccer team was there.  They were on the way to a game in Tanzania.  While I dealt with our paperwork and bags, Justin went over and talked to them.  They were nice and several of them spoke some English.  He got their autographs for our soccer star, Tatum.  They seemed amused to be asked, but it was fun and a big deal for Tatum.  I'm bummed that you can't take pictures in the Addis airport.  That would be a fun one to have.

We traveled about 36 hours to get home.  The flight to Frankfurt was easy.  We met a guy who not only knew where Clovis is, but his wife's family has a dairy there.  I grew up on a dairy farm in Clovis.  Such a small world!  We spend our time in Germany sound asleep on the benches.  The 12 hour flight to Houston was loooooong.  The plane was packed and there were not individual screens at each seat for movies and such.  The first plane we were on that didn't have that and also our longest flight.  Go figure.  We tried to stay awake for the entire flight so that we'd be able to switch our nights and days back around when we got to my parents' house.

Got to Houston, cleared customs and immigration and called our kiddos!!!  It was so good to hear their sweet voices.  I was surprised at what a relief it was to hear English everywhere and to be able to communicate easily.  I was hardly able to stay awake at that point.  We walked around the airport some, but as soon as we sat down I'd be falling asleep.  Somehow got onto the plane and slept through the entire flight to Amarillo.  Woke up right before landing and bolted out of our seats as soon as we stopped, apologizing and explaining that we hadn't seen our kids in eight days and we weren't usually so pushy and rude.  :-)


We got to the luggage area right before our kids arrived with Tio and Chyanne.  What a wonderful reunion!  Best welcoming committee ever.  They had signs that said Mom and Dad Robbs We Are Your Ride.  How cute is that???  We even got a pineapple as a welcoming gift.  Tio and Chyanne took us to dinner at Olive Garden.  Then Tio drove our suburban most of the way to my parents house.  Justin made a valiant effort to stay awake, but I passed out before we were even out of Amarillo.  Got to the farm, collapsed in bed and woke up sick the next day, but so happy to be with the fab four!  

The four hour drive home to Rio Rancho seemed extra long.  Justin worked on homework until dark, when he noticed that I was having trouble focusing and staying awake.  Super safe.  We switched drivers and made it home sweet home!


Amazing trip!  Paris was wonderful, too.  But it just pales in comparison to meeting our son.


The issue with the orphanage license has us on edge for about a week, especially after Holt announced that it would probably be the end of December before the problem was resolved.  I was a mess.  Then I got an email from a friend who was in Ethiopia to appear in court saying that the license was back in place.  Sure enough, Holt announced it the next day!  Awesome!  So now we're waiting to hear when our embassy date is so we can go back and bring our boy home.  We expect it to be around the beginning of February. 

05 December 2010

Ethiopia - First Half of Day 2

 We got up at six Friday morning to get ready for court.  We weren't nervous at all.  We had a filling breakfast at the Jemimah and then waited, along with the other two couples, for our driver.  He was only a few minutes late and off we went to court.  We got to the court building and waited for awhile in the van while the driver went to find our lawyer.  After about ten minutes, they came to get us and we went into the courthouse.

I think we went to about the third floor and sat down in a bare room lined with chairs.  After awhile, I started looking at the people sitting across from us and realized some of them were obviously birth parents.  I immediately teared up and almost couldn't breathe.  One woman, directly across from me, looked completely stricken.  I ached for her so badly and got so angry at the whole dang unfair world.  There were some other women there whom I think were also birth mothers.  Jennifer noticed them too and we both had a hard time with it.  The reality of it was almost too much to bear.

Then a loud group of European adoptive parents came in, acting and behaving totally inappropriately.  Jennifer and I were very annoyed by them.  They got shushed more than once by the girl calling people back to see the judge. 

Lots of people got called in and most came out seeming happy.  We waited two hours, getting increasingly nervous.  Our lawyer talked to the girl calling people a couple of different times.  That made us even more anxious.  Finally Jeff and Jennifer got called in.  They came back out after a few minutes and their faces said something was wrong.  Barbi and Jack went in while Jen told us what had happened.  The license for the orphanage was in the process of being renewed and we could not pass court until it was back in place. 

We got called in next.  The judge was a beautiful woman with a very commanding presence.  She spoke softly and asked us the expected questions.  She then told us about the license and said we could go home, but it would take longer while we waited for the license. 

We were all in absolute shock.  We were the first  group from Holt that this happened to.  Our lawyer knew nothing about it and started making phone calls immediately.  When we got outside, he said that the process was underway for the renewal but there was no estimated time frame as to when it might be done.  He asked if we wanted to go to lunch or to the care center.  Really, why do they even ask that?  We obviously all wanted to be with our children.

Driving away from the courthouse was so disappointing.  We'd expected to be the legal parents of our children, but now we didn't know what the heck was going on and were trying hard not to panic.  It was a terrible feeling.

We went straight to the care center and arrived at the same exact time as the group who was there to pick their children up.  It was truly awful.  We didn't know when or if 'our kids' would be able to come home and it was hard to witness the beauty of families uniting.  I know that's selfish, but I was still in shock about what had just happened.  We sat through each family being presented with their child and then we waited and waited for Little E.  Finally, they came and said he was eating lunch and that we could go upstairs to be with him.

He recognized us immediately and got super shy.  He wouldn't look at us and refused to eat.  It was classic three year old behavior and we loved it.  All of the kids seated around the little tables were to well behaved.  The boys at E's table were showing off for us, but he stayed shy.  Several nannies tried to get him to eat, but he actually put his hand over his mouth and refused.  Completely out of character for him.  He's an eater, by all accounts!  Yes, that's his cute little hand in the picture.  Ethiopians do not have a cultural thing about pink and lavender being girl colors.  We were amused to find him wearing a lavender sweater with a huge pink heart on the front.  Well I was amused, Justin complained to me several times tried to be a good sport about it.

It was fun to watch the other kids eat.  The boys at E's table needed more food and they politely took their empty plates to the back of the room and the nannies gave them more.  There was a ton of of food, which made me happy.  Eventually they gave up on E and we took him downstairs to play. 

We only got about thirty minutes with him.  He played a lot with Justin and warmed up quickly.  He talked and repeated some more English words.  He again latched onto the green truck we brought.  Too soon our driver came and I could barely contain my emotions.  We started saying goodbye and Little E wrapped his body around me tight.  Justin had to pull him off to get his turn.  He wrapped around Justin even more tightly and would. not. let. go.  We had to literally peel him off.  Terrible feeling!  E started blowing us kisses and I was about done for. 

We took him upstairs to his bedroom for naptime.  He sleeps in a little room lined with beds.  All of the toddlers were sound asleep under little blankets.  We practiacally ran downstairs and out the door.  As we were putting our shoes on, Sister Martha came outside to say goodbye.  She reminded us that God has our kiddos in His hands until we can get back and that's when I lost it.  Completely lost it.  I was sobbing and could not stop.  It felt like my heart was breaking in two.  It would not have been so dramatic, I don't think, if we'd passed court and knew there was an end in sight.  But, we had no idea what was going on, why the license wasn't in place, why we hadn't been told about it before court, and no idea how long it would be before we could return to Ethiopia for our sweet children.

We reluctantly climbed back into the van and headed to the guesthouse for lunch...

01 December 2010

Ethiopia - Second Half of Day 1

We arrived back at the Holt office and sat down with our lawyer.  He went over when to be at court and what to expect.  It was a short meeting.  Then, each family was quizzed by a staff member on possible questions we would be asked at court.  We found out that the intake orphanage is called Mussie Children's Home.  We had no idea how important that information would later become.

After it was clear that we're all familiar with our child's history and our adoption timeline, we got to look through the huge notebook that the staff keeps for each child.  The binder is probably three inches thick and contains all of our paperwork.  It felt strange to see our pictures and signatures and personal information in a notebook in Ethiopia.  It was all also translated to Amharic and that was interesting.  I took several pictures of documents, including what appeared to be a birth certificate for Little E.  It was probably issued when he went into care in August 2009.  The most important find, though, was a picture of E's birthfather.  It was small and a little blurry, but it's still so special that we got to see it.  My heart hurt looking at it and thinking about the circumstances that led to his child becoming our child.

When we were all done going through the files, we piled back in the van and headed to the golf club for lunch.  We were all still on cloud nine from meeting our sweet children.  The food was great and the company was enjoyable.  We sat at a table on the patio and enjoyed the warm-ish weather.  We finished just as our driver was returning to get us.  He gave us the choice of going shopping or returning to the care centers.  Uhhhhh.... you have to ask???  


He took it back to the care center and it was obvious that we were not expected yet.  It was bath time for the older kids and nap time for the younger ones.  Sister Martha said a couple of different times that we were deviating from the schedule and were supposed to be shopping.  We waited while they finished Little E's bath.  They had scrubbed all of the pen marks off of him and he was wearing fresh, slightly damp clothes.


We went into the upper level of the playroom and he took to us immediately.  We played with the truck and read and then he and Justin started tossing a football back and forth.  E loved it and started getting really excited.  We tried to keep him quiet, since Jeff and Jennifer's baby had just gone to sleep and they were getting great cuddle time just a few feet away from us.  Soon, though, Sister Martha came in and spoke to E in Amharic and then told us that she told him no throwing balls inside.  Ooops.  :)  So, we started kicking the ball around instead and he loved that, too.
A nanny came by with a cup with some sort of smoothie for him and he held it with the bottom in his palm.  Justin and I both thought that disaster was coming.  But no, he know what he's doing.  Super quick, he brought it to his mouth.  One, two, three huge gulps and the whole cup was empty.


Little E wanted us to read to him, so I grabbed a book with lots of animals.  He wanted me to hold him while Justin read.  He was initially babbling on and on in Amharic, but then we realized that he was starting to repeat the English words Justin was saying!!!  We were blown away.  We haven't known all this time if he would really be able to speak, how clear it would be if he can, or how quickly he'll be able to adapt to a new language.  We were beyond thrilled to hear him talking up a storm in Amharic and elated to hear him attempting English!  Praise God!


Soon after that, our driver came in the door.  I turned my back and pretended not to see him.  That didn't stop the inevitable, though.  I gave E a long hug and he tolerated it.  But when Justin hugged him, E latched on and wrapped his arms and legs around him.  He got really distressed not wanting Justin to leave him.  It was one of the hardest things I've ever done to peel him off of Justin and walk out that door.

We went from there to shop at the Leper's Hospital.  We found a lot of beautiful things and it actually lifted our spirits.  


We arrived back at the guesthouse just in time to do a quick turnaround and jump in a taxi headed to the Sheraton for a Thanksgiving dinner buffet.  Traffic was very congested.  We finally just got out of our taxi and walked.  We had no idea what a big event this was.  We had to go through two security checkpoints to get into the hotel.  I don't know what to say about the Sheraton really.  It's one of the fanciest hotels I've ever been in and it was completely at odds with what we'd been seeing all day.  The food was great and we enjoyed spending time with other adoptive parents.  It really was magical.  But, I also had an underlying uneasiness the entire time.  I felt guilty for having so much food available to us and plenty of money to pay for it after we'd seen people all day who probably don't know where their next meal is coming from.  It was a glaring contrast.  This is us with Jeff and Jennifer.  Jen and I are wearing our Toms and our new scarves from the Leper's Hospital.
Ok.  This might be the funniest thing that happened on the whole trip.  We finished dinner and went out to meet our driver.  Two guys saw where we were headed and rushed ahead of us to open the van door.  After we were all in and seated, they wanted a tip.  Well, Jeff pulls out a wad of birr but couldn't see the denominations so he held it up to try to see and then said, "uh.  no."  Meanwhile, Justin is trying to get some birr out of his money belt which is, of course, inside his pants.  So he's digging around with his hand down the front of his pants and the guy sees what he's doing and gets this horrified expression on his face.  He yells, "you not happy with service" and slams the door.  We laughed all the way back to the Jemimah.  Poor guy thought he was going to get something totally different than he bargained for.


When we got back to the guesthouse, I was able to connect my phone to the computer and get a connection fast enough to send a picture to the kids.  Then, we headed off to bed so we could be up bright and early for court on Friday morning.