Christmas Struggles

We are still waiting for news of an embassy date.  It will probably be at least another month before we know anything.  We assume that all of our paperwork is now in order and that we're legally Little E's parents.  Most likely, our embassy date will be February 8.  That's not for sure, though.  It's just an educated guess based on communication with mamas who are as desperate and obsessive anxious as me.

This year, we've really struggled with Christmas for three reasons.  Most obviously, we started out last Christmas morning crying over our tiny dead baby as he lay in my hands.  Secondly, our children are on two different continents and it's impossible to explain the emotion of that to someone who has not experienced it.  We are beyond ready for Little E to join our family and to put the whole adoption experience behind us.  Third, compounding the sorrow of everything else, three weeks ago we were in Ethiopia and witnessed the stark need of the people there.  We dropped from that right into the middle of the annual, materialistic frenzy that passes as the celebration of our Savior's birth.  We can hardly stomach it this go round.  The kids don't need anything.  We don't need anything.  I feel like we're spending money out of obligation, rather than joy.  Every item I purchase, I stop and think how many kids that money could feed in Ethiopia.  What a difference my measly fifty bucks would make over there.  Ugh.

I don't know what the answer to our dilemma is.  We're evaluating our lives and discussing choices we could make after Justin graduates from law school next December.  We know that we want to live even more radically than we already do.  We only get one chance at this life and we want to make it count.


As you go through the remainder of this Christmas season, consider what you could do to make a difference in the world.  If you're still looking for last minute gifts, maybe a donation to help those in need would be just the thing.  Here's a link to Gifts of Hope at Holt: https://www.holtinternational.org/gifts/
 

Please check out the link above and listen to the song below.  Remember to appreciate your loves ones this Christmas season and focus on the things that are most important.  Above all, don't forget what we're truly celebrating.

Have I not wept for those in trouble? Has not my soul grieved for the poor? Job 30:25