Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world. ~ James 1:27
Big, huge, super exciting news today! We are to appear at Ethiopian High Court on November 26, 2010!!! We are beyond thrilled. We didn't expect to hear anything until the end of September. Now, we can book our tickets three months in advance and relax knowing that we've done everything we can do. It's an amazing feeling to finally know the date that we will meet our Little E. A mom who recently brought her child home met him while she was at the care center. She said he seemed sweet with a bit of a mischievous smile. I can't wait to see for myself!!
The court date is great for us for a couple of different reasons. Most important to us, our first miscarriage was the day before Thanksgiving 2001. Since then, it's been a bittersweet holiday for us. There's always serving of sadness to go along with the ham and pumpkin pie. This won't erase the loss of that child, but it does, as a fellow adoption mom put it, bring beauty from the ashes. I loved that she said that, since that's how I've described our adoption journey - rising from the ashes of our most recent miscarriage on Christmas Day 2009. Again, I reference our adoption theme song --- What Faith Can Do by Kutlass. Makes me cry every time with its relevance. Our dreams are moving mountains, I've seen miracles just happen, and our broken hearts ARE becoming brand new. That's what faith can do.
Secondly, Justin's in his third year of law school. He kinda has to be there. He kinda has to be in Ethiopia, too. [I keep insisting that he should get some sort of credit for appearing in court halfway around the world.] For our court date to fall on a week when he's already off of school and work for the most part is an amazing answer to prayer. He's talked to most of his professors already and they're cool with it. Still, the sheer volume of material he would miss by being gone for a whole week of class would be overwhelming for him. Now, we don't have to worry about that. Awesome!
Finally, childcare should be much easier to line up that week [right, Clovis peeps??]. My mom will be off of school for at least the end of the week and hopefully other people will step up to volunteer for a day or half day. We'll get back to the states over the weekend and be ready on Monday to get back to life, even if we're beyond exhausted.
Our next thing is to figure out how to pay for all of this traveling. It seems that it will be a little cheaper than we were anticipating. Our flower bulb fundraiser is still going for a few more days. If you're interested, let me know and I'll get the info to you!
Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the east and gather you from the west. - Isaiah 43:5
Last weekend, we headed home to take pictures with my family to celebrate my parents' 35th wedding anniversary. We all drove to my family's ranch and had a crazy Saturday night. Boy, did we have fun! 16 people and a two hour photo shoot. Kierstyn put on quite the modeling performance and Justin and I got in on the action some, too. In one of the pics on Kasey's blog, the one with my parents and us four sibs, I'm trying to get everyone to do a 'top model' pose but it seems that I'm the only one who actually did it. :)
Our photographer was amazing. I've been hearing about her for years from a mutual friend and was so excited to finally meet her. If you're anywhere near Clovis and want some awesome pictures, I highly recommend her.
To represent Little E in the pictures, our 'little' part of the family wore a red ribbon around our wrists. There's an ancient Chinese saying that a red string connects the hearts of those who are destined to meet. So, Little E may be half a world away right now, but our hearts are connected to him. Kasey took a picture of our ribbons [minus Maci -- she couldn't be troubled to hold still!] so we can have that for him someday. It's a very sweet picture, she has it on her blog.
Today is a day I dread arriving. Last November, Angie and I found out we were expecting our fifth child, who we had nicknamed Cinco. We were very excited, but only told a few people.
Things were going well as Christmas approached. On December 22, as is our tradition, we had our family Christmas celebration before traveling to Clovis for the big event. Typically, we go out to eat at a nice restaurant for lunch (usually at Olive Garden), then return home to open presents and relax for the rest of the day.
We decided to tell the kids about Cinco as a Christmas surprise, or more specifically, I decided we should and Angie gave in. They were so excited to be welcoming in a new addition to our family. We had a joyous meal and discussed the new baby a lot. Then we headed home to open presents.
Maci fell asleep in the car on the way home, so I sat with her for a few minutes after we got home while we tried to decide whether to wake her up to open presents or let her sleep while the other kids waited. Meanwhile, Angie went in to the restroom. She returned with a grim look on her face and told me she was bleeding.
My first thought was "Lord please no." We'd been down this road four times before, twice it ended in miscarriage. Angie and I didn't know what to do, so we let the kids open their presents and hoped it would go away, but it didn't. We spent all night at the ER, knowing there was nothing that could be done, but praying for something. The doctor told us he detected a heartbeat, but the hCG levels were low. We didn't let our hopes get to high, but at least we knew thought was a chance.
Angie spent the next day resting, but the bleeding continued. On Christmas Eve, we headed to Clovis for the big, family Christmas. When we got there, Angie told her parents what was going on. We went through the motions of Christmas Eve festivities for the kids. Poor Angie was so strong through the evening. She didn't let on to anyone what we were going through.
The next morning Angie got in the tub because she was cramping badly. I sat with her because we knew what was happening. She was losing the baby on Christmas Day, just three days after we told the kids and had that happy lunch. Sure enough, the baby was "delivered" in the tub at about 8 weeks gestation. The embryo was about the size of a grape. We could make out the major parts through the sac. We could see the outline of the head, the back bone and a little black spot that was the heart.
We held Cinco in our hands and cried for several minutes. Then I went forward with one of the hardest days of my life. I started with telling my father-in-law and watched as tears welled up in the eyes of the strongest man I know. Then I told my mother-in-law and the kids. I held the kids in my arms and cried with them. Then I called my mom and told her the situation. It was easier to tell her over the phone than to look her in the eye. She knows the pain. She's been down this road too.
I took the kids to breakfast at my mom's house, then back to the in-laws for lunch and then to my dads for dinner. Throughout the day I put on my happy face, took pictures and tried to avoid ruining Christmas for the kids. No one in the family knew about the pregnancy, so I had to tell each person about the situation as the arrived. Each time, I had to go through the shock again, but still hold it together. Angie was a wreck. I don't think she remembers anything from that bath until Kierstyn's birthday on the 27th. Even then, the next week is pretty sketchy. I vaguely remember going to a New Year's Eve party at a friends house.
I tell this story now because today is Cinco's due date. The due date is the second hardest day of the miscarriage because you can't help but think about what might have been. But it is also when you can start putting the tragedy behind you and begin to heal. Obviously, Christmas day will always be hard, just like Thanksgiving. We had our first miscarriage in 2001 on the day before Thanksgiving.
On this day, I choose to honor God because through this tragedy God has begun a mighty work in our lives. This tragedy set us on the path to Little E. See God wanted us to have another child, but he already had a child in mind for us. Angie and I made the decision to try for another baby in August, 2009. This is exactly when Little E entered the orphanage. God had already delivered our next child to us as soon as we decided we were going to add to our family. He knew this little boy needed a family and he began working on our hearts.
As we began our adoption journey, Angie prayed that the baby we would adopt would be born near Cinco's due date (at the time we were looking to adopt a baby). Little E's birthday is August 9th. Our God is mighty, powerful and yet personal. He knew exactly how to send us the message that Little E was our child and he had planned for it well in advance.
Lord, today I choose to trust you with my life. I choose to trust you with my family. Lord, you have cared for me in the past. You fulfill my daily needs in the present and I choose to trust you with my future.
There is no better song for moments like these. If you don't know the story of this song, look up Horatio Spafford and "it is well with my soul."
Little E is three today! It was a bittersweet day, but we talked a lot about what fun we'll be having with him on his next birthday. Pretty cool day to have a birthday this year - 8/9/10. :) KJ baked him a cake and all three girls decorated it. It's amazing to me how much love we already have for this little guy we've never even met!
The kids in our homeschool group have joined forces to raise money for plane tickets to Ethiopia for our family and the Norris family! The Norris' are also adopting from Ethiopia --- two precious girls!
So the kids are selling flower bulbs and the brochure is making me drool! I love, love, love growing flowers [even though I mostly kill them]! My favorites are the black tulips pictured above.
If you would like to see the brochure, you can click on the link below. Good luck deciding what to order. They all look exciting! You can send me a message with your order and we'll work out how to get the money to us. If you're a member of Celebration, you can talk to just about any of the homeschooling children and they can take your order.
All orders should be prepaid. We are taking orders from now through September 15. The bulbs will be received soon after that, just in time for fall planting season. We'll hand deliver them to you. If you're in Clovis, don't despair! We'll make a special trip down there to drop your bulbs off.
The bulbs are guaranteed to bloom. If they don't, they'll be replaced for free. Check out the brochure and thanks so much for supporting us!!!
HIM: IT manager/law student
HER: Homeschooling mama/birth doula
US: Doing everything we can to simplify life and raise our four children to glorify God in everything they do. We are currently in the process of adopting a child from Ethiopia.
